Growing up, we were dreaming of going to college. We were living in a place where a teenager doesn’t have a lot of things to do. So naturally, there wasn’t anything more exciting than the idea of leaving and entering the life of adults. “But you are sure that you want to go all the way to California? You wouldn’t miss this place?” a friend asked us once.
“Yeah! Well, it is not like we are going to another planet, you know!” These kinds of questions used to seem lame to us, honestly. Everyone was leaving family behind; it’s like a natural thing to do!
However, when we got an acceptance letter from UC Berkley, and it was clear we were moving away from family, things began to change. It was like we were dreaming, and now we woke up to realize that the dream became a reality. And all of a sudden, we felt overwhelmingly sad and anxious. Those feelings were confusing for us because we were sure that we wanted this.
“So, why is this happening, now?!” we asked our parents. They said that it is expected to feel that way. That regardless of our desire, the fact is that we are leaving our whole lives behind. Leaving home means not seeing people we love, not going to our favorite bars, etc. However, it also means starting a new adventure. And the fact is that there are ways to cope with moving away: keep in contact with your loved ones, join clubs and find new friends and try to lift your spirits!
Reasons You Should Move Away from Home
There are a ton of reasons for moving away from parents. As you could see, in our case it is a desire to go to a good school. However, it was also connected with the wish to start living as adults. Whatever caused your decision to move away from friends and family, you should know that there’s also a bright side to it:
You Become Autonomous
Once you leave, you’ll realize that you have to do everything by yourself. You have to find a good doctor, make friends, pay your bills, cook, etc. You have to get used to moving around the city, find new favorite places, and so on. All this can be a bit scary at the beginning. But it will also be stimulative and exciting, as such freedom will make you feel independent and capable. Finally, you will see the decision about moving away from family was the best one you made.
You Get a New Perspective on the Word Home
Most of us grew up listening to how there is no better place than home and that we should go everywhere but return home. By home, people who tell us this means the place where we grew up or where our family lives. But is it the only thing we can call home? For those who live in their parent’s house, the concept of home changes. It becomes a place where you feel comfortable living. If you have a good life and friends in your new place; it also becomes home. So keep that in mind if you ever think about moving far away from family – you can still be in touch and find a new place to call home, in addition to the one you were born and grew up in.
You Will Mature
Each time you move, you encounter new things and people. Some of these experiences are positive, while others are not. But in any case, this will allow you to grow and become the person you want to be.
You Can Start Fresh
That is a great thing about moving somewhere no one knows you. Of course, you can’t change your personality. But you can have more time thinking about yourself and your needs, possibilities, and desires. Perhaps you have some bad memories associated with your hometown, or you’re moving away from family for a job – that’s a pretty fresh and exciting start since you get to meet new people and get a whole new experience.
General Benefits of Moving Away
- Meeting new people and forming connections
- Gaining independence
- Having your own space
- Learning new skills
- You start to appreciate your family more
What to Consider Before Moving Away
Maybe you are moving away from family for a job. It is also possible that you want to live with your girlfriend from another state or even country. Whatever is your reason for moving away from family and friends, there are certain factors you need to consider before making a final decision. So ask yourself the following questions before you decide leaving the family and your old life behind:
- What will I lose?
- What I won’t get back?
- Will I be able to stay in touch with friends?
- How much time will I need to find new friends?
- Am I willing to accept losing some friends?
It is useful to answer these questions in advance because that way you are prepared for many of the things that might happen.
What To Expect When You Move Away from Family
As we already mentioned, you need to be prepared for a storm of negative emotions. One of the most common is guilt about moving far away from family is leaving them, your friends, home – everything behind. So you can also be angry, afraid, anxious, etc. Most people are also worried about the ability to meet your friends. Or their kids’ adjustment in the new school. Also, there is the question of maintaining contact with old friends.
On the bright side, you can be proud of yourself for going after your dreams and ambitions. You can be thrilled about living in the city where you imagined you would be since childhood. Apart from that, you can also be excited about creating new bonds.
How to Deal with Moving Away from Home and Family?
Okay; so, you went through all pros and cons and decided to go through with the decision to leave. That is fantastic, and we want to congratulate you for your courage to become independent. Now we need to see how to cope with moving away from family and friends and all the emotions that will appear.
- This is not the end: First of all, you need to understand that just because you are moving away from family doesn’t mean cutting the contacts. On the contrary, you can still talk every day. Okay, there is a distance, but nowadays, we live in a digital era. You can call and video chat with them whenever you like, even showing your new home and places around!
- Stay positive: After all, moving away from home and family is what you wanted, isn’t it? Yes, it can be difficult for your kid to make new friends; or for you to make mom friends, etc. And that can make you regretful and nostalgic. But keep in mind that you moved away to pursue your goals and dreams. So focus on the excitement of life in a new environment.
- Allow yourself time to rest: Give yourself time to feel whatever you are feeling. Don’t run away from sadness or anger. When you move into a new place, take some days to rest before you start new projects.
- Create a dream home: It is essential that you feel comfortable in your new home. So, take time to arrange everything how you like it. Put photos of your family and friends, buy flowers that you like, etc. Simply put, surround yourself with objects that make you happy.
- Start appreciating your new life: Go out to explore the city; join clubs, social events, etc.
Tips to Alleviate Moving-Related Depression
- Keep yourself busy
- Develop a routine
- Keep old habits
- Write a journal
- Get a pet
Conclusion
Hope that we helped ease your mind with how to move away from home and what can make it easier for you! All and all, the decision about moving away from family and friends is a big and brave one. We know it is never easy, no matter how determined you are. Remember that it is essential to allow yourself to feel all the emotions that emerge. It doesn’t mean that there is something wrong. They are part of the adjustment to new life. After some time, when you get settled, you will see that it was the best decision you could make.
So how moving away from home was for you? How did you feel and cope with it? Then share your experience in the comments below: perhaps your advice will help more people cope with how to move away from home.